Sister 3: “Excellent, Sir!”
Brother 1: “Wait, why did you call [sister 2] ‘Sir’?”
Sister 3: “I called her Sir because she sounded brilliant and scientific! Not like a lowly woman!”
My mom was explaining to my younger siblings (aged 18, 16, 13 and 8) how the vast conspiracy aiming to take over America and destroy Christianity is getting the upper hand.
Me: “But if the Government was controlled by a conspiracy like that, they would hardly have given Hobby Lobby their case.”
Mom: “Oh, but that decision wasn’t unanimous! And I think They throw us a bone sometimes just to keep us quiet. Just to- test the resistance.”
Brother 2: “Ah!” He’s a lanky 18 year old in a rotting t-shirt full of holes. “So when people say that we’ve won something, it’s actually just Them tricking us into thinking things are getting better, so we wont fight Them.” His newly deep voice sounds confident and cunning. He sees that he understands something Most People don’t. Most People aren’t clever like We are.
Me: “So if things don’t go your way it’s proof that They’re winning, and if things do go your way it’s also proof that They’re winning?”
Pastor stood behind the podium of the summer camp’s main hall. Everyone in the auditorium knew why we were here. So much of Christianity in America was corrupt, frivolous, and lacking commitment to God. Also, years ago, the main church body had kept the building when they kicked Pastor out.
“Some people act like it’s a big deal that they turned their lives over to God.” he said. “They make it into this dramatic story about how they decided to give their lives to God. As if they did something.”
“No!’ he went on. “We are only saved because God allows us to be saved. He does it! Not us!”
I felt a tad dizzy and kept my head down, focusing on my sketch.
He had spent the first part of the sermon explaining how people who didn’t accept God and didn’t become Christians did this because they didn’t want to know the Truth and deliberately turned away.
If you don’t chose God, it was your own evil choice and you are held responsible. But if you join God’s side, not even your choice counts as good.
No matter what happens, God is the only one responsible for Good and YOU are the one responsible for Evil.
Despite God having all the power and you having none.
God’s a tricky devil, isn’t he?