The Nightmare Art Colony

Last night I was moving boxes. I noticed that my box of old journals was getting musty, and, I hate to say it, starting to mold. I took all the journals outside to air and drink a little lysol.  As any sane person in the middle of a project does, I leafed through one or two. It’s been years since I packed them away.

I found this entry in a book marked “2009-     ”

For the sake of clarity, I am currently a bit Jungian. I think that dreams give you useful information about your own state of mind and can bring to your conscious attention things you have noticed or believe subconsciously. The subconscious tends to pick up on things before the conscious mind does. But I do not believe that dreams necessarily give you information from outside of your own head. So- if I dream about someone, it reflects what I subconsciously think,  not what they subconsciously think.

Also, things and people in dreams may be symbolic of other things that they themselves are not, in waking life.

2009 was before I had discovered Jung. I don’t know what I thought then.

***

I dreamed that I moved into one of Was Hurd’s Art colonies- except it really was one this time, established and a lot of people lived there. Something horrible was happening- some kind of plant got in and started to overgrown everything. People weren’t leaving but there were fewer and fewer people left. They [the ones who were left] were trying to get away.

I dreamed that a couple nights ago. [I had read something] just before I went to sleep about dreams being meaningful, and how you should record and consider them. I went over in my mind, how I used to do that and nothing ever really came of it, but fleetingly decided I might give it one more shot. I dreamed that, and wrote it down because it was odd.  Except for Kristen mentioning him once… I haven’t thought about Wes since I finished school, and didn’t have any massively strong opinions about him then. Later that morning, the mail came and the News and Views got plucked down in front of me. I got suddenly kind of scared, and when I opened it, in fact the article was by Wes Hurd.

The article was only the good old Gutenberg Message about the pursuit of truth and such. As I read it, however, it seemed to me that Wes kept referring to their [the Gutenberg] version [of Christianity] as ‘truer’ than ordinary American Xianity.

It occurs to me- what place can there be in existentialism for self congratulation? If you decide you have arrived, doesn’t that mean you have stopped the Pursuit [of Truth]? Isn’t the whole point of saying there is something wrong with Xianity in America that Xians in America seem to think they are as they should be, and have [therefore] stopped looking beyond themselves? But if we have stopped looking beyond ourselves, what good are we to them?

A plant that overgrows its surroundings kills everything that is not itself. A cancer kills [the body] when it begins to transform all the other tissues into it’s own kind of tissue.

We [Gutenbergers] complain that beliefs are held ritually and not through the passion of the mind and spirit- but do we really believe that there are no rituals of the intellect? We complain that they become a cancer, mindlessly reproducing themselves, but shouldn’t the accusation [leveled] outward make us turn fearfully inward [to see if we are doing the same thing]?

Have we really written down and codified the great Tao?

Couldn’t even our Pursuit of Truth become a Wild Hunt- where our fantasy selves are caught up into pursuit of an illusion- such that we pass even God by [without seeing him]?

I am venting here and not writing well. I’m not sure I should bring up the dream, but I think I should write Wes and ask him about this. The coincidence is too much.

***

I never did write him.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s